Yes folks, school officials in New Jersey actually felt that an alleged ninja sighting was enough of a security threat to shut the school down.
Sweet fucking christ.
It reminds me of an interesting essay I read recently which argued that the US has as a sort of “autoimmune disease, where an organism’s defense system goes into overdirve so much that it fails to recognize itself and attacks its own cells.” In some ways, that seems amazingly accurate. All manner of police, security and authority officials live on a hair trigger, and will attack their fellow citizens rather than actual threats.
Of course, this analogy breaks down quickly when you realize that America’s police, security, and authority officials don’t actually exist to protect the “body” or its “cells”, but to mantain public compliance with a system of rules and structures that benefit their ideological masters and the guys who sign their paychecks.
In conclusion, ninjas are awesome.