Lying Media Bastards

May 28, 2008

Sometimes Liars Are Untruthful

So you probably heard by now, former White House Spokesman Scott McClellan has released a new book, in which he accuses the White House of doing naughty things during his tenure: lies, propaganda, and that most heinous of crimes, tricking Scott McClellan.

As one would expect, American liberals are seizing these revelations (that we were all largely aware of) as the smoking mushroom cloud that exposes the Bush crimes for all the world to see.

Except that McClellan is a liar.

Seriously, the guy’s job in the Bush White House was to tell one bald-faced, easily disprovable lie after another to the media and the American people. He wasn’t that good at it, but he did it, lied for a living for three years.

But now that the liar is saying things that Liberals like, his word is to be trusted?

No folks, it doesn’t work like that. The man is a fucking liar. A fucking liar who is trying to sell copies of his new book, as well as try to clear his name in the history books. Like many before (and surely after) him, McClellan is telling the story of how all of the terrible things done by the Bush regime are Not Their Fault. The earlier you start telling your version of the story, the more likely your future encyclopedia entry won’t have phrases like “impeached” or “tried for treason” in it.

Of course, I must also note that McClellan seems to also use his book to try to clear Bush’s name, and explain how Bush was misled by his evil incompetent advisors. (Is there a stronger word than “incompetent”? Can we make “anticompetent” a word?)

The White House has gone into damage control mode thanks to McClellan’s book. Their strategy seems to be to paint McClellan as disgruntled, and possibly crazy (”We are puzzled. It is sad. This is not the Scott we knew,” says new paid White House Spokesliar Dana Perino). Also, they are calling him a traitor.

But, the good news is that horrible, amoral sacks of crap are using the media to beat on each other. Everyone wins.

Posted by Jake on May 28, 2008 10:20 pm

3 Comments »

  1. On the flip side, if McClellan is a liar and “out of the loop” as Rove says, doesn’t that make Perino and the others also liars and out of the loop? Therefore their denials and defense of the administration… you get the picture. Besides, McClellan being a liar in general does not mean much of what he says now isn’t true. Like the proverbial broken clock being right twice a day.

    Comment by T P — May 29, 2008 @ 5:59 am

  2. You say liar like it’s a bad thing.

    I only visit this site because it says “lying” right in the title.

    Lying is the American Way. This Great Nation was founded on lies.

    Freedom & Liberty are for the White Con-querers. Not slaves, women or the original inhabitants.

    Here, have a peace treaty (hee hee hee). Here, have a blanket (never mind the measles, hee hee hee). Here, have 20 acres and a mule (haw, haw, knee-slapper). Here, take this wafer: “body of Christ” “Amen”. Now bend over, son.

    All lies. All liars. Our biggest export?

    fantasy: Movies. TV. Video games. Pretend, all pretend. All made up.
    Fake. Lies. It’s kind of, I dunno, in our blood? Lights, camera, commence lying! Or as John Connor puts so succinctly in Terminator when Sarah asks why the Terminator won’t stop trying to kill them: “It’s what they do!”

    It’s what America does.

    Surely, you’ve heard by now that in any business negotiation, the first one to name a dollar amount loses. Why is that? Because information is being withheld. All business transactions are predicated on lies of omission. “Here. Have $24 in trinkets to use your island for a little while..” Haw haw haw.

    “We’re here, we lie. Get used to it.”

    Scott McClellan is the exemplary American. He deserves a Medal of Freedom, because he can lie like nobody’s business, on either side. I freaking love Scott McClellan. He is the face of the lying fascists in power - out front, lying regularly, right to your face. Awesome. Beautiful in its majesty and boldness. More fortitude in his left nut than Bush and all his cronies combined. Bush is a terrible liar. He smirks when he lies, half the time trying to suppress a giggle. Colin Powell had to resign, because he couldn’t man up enough to face his lies. He sure is no Condi. Scottie boy, on the other hand, beautiful. Just beautiful. Unflappable, unmoved, implacable. Fuckin’ awesome, dude! The consummate American.

    Do Americans have a monopoly on lying? Hardly. We just do it so much better than every other country, just like so many things we do better than every other country: Like health care, education, counting votes, disaster response, infant mortality, taking care of the elderly and poor, gender and race equality, quality of life, use of force only when necessary…

    Oh, sorry. Those weren’t lies, were they (hee hee hee).

    Long Live the Lying Media Bastards!

    Comment by Dead Civilian — June 7, 2008 @ 10:02 am

  3. Whoa, DC, take it easy. There’s always hope amigo. I’m no fan of Manifest Destiny, but any county that gives you Mickey Mouse, bubble gum and Chuck Berry can’t be all bad.

    Comment by jrfunkenstein — July 25, 2008 @ 6:32 am

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