Lying Media Bastards

February 1, 2006

Talky Talky Talky

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So, Bush read the words off a teleprompter last night in front of Congress, surely written by people not him. Overall, they were boring and vague, meaningless until you look at the fine print of his propositions. DJ Al and I did our “Mystery Science Theater”-style commentary and mockery of the speech in real time, which you can listen to here if you like. It was fun to do, and we had our share of comedic moments, but still, it required listening to Bush talk for a full hour, which isn’t pleasant.

Just a few comments:

1) Bush opened his speech by invoking Coretta Scott King, the civil rights activist and wife of Martin Luther King Jr., who had died that morning. I did not know much about Ms. King, but listening to NPR on the drive to the station yesterday, I learned that she was actively fighting against many of Bush’s key policies (gay rights, racial justice, AIDS, Iraq war). Which means that he actually made her life worse and her fight harder, and yet he acted like they were on the same side. Bastard.

2) Every year, Bush seems to throw out at least one crazy item into the SOTU. In 2003, he talked about a Moon base. In 2005, he was abruptly worried about the use of steroids in sports. So Al and I tried to figure out in advance what would be his crazy proposition for 2006. Al guessed “to end Mad Cow Disease in our time” (Bush made no mention of this, although he did go on about curing malaria). The winner of the crazy Bush plan: a ban on the creation of human-animal hybrids.

No, I’m not kidding. Bush wants to ban the creation of werewolves or fishmen or something.

3) It was kinda funny when Bush mentioned the failure of his Social Security reform privatization plan, and the Democrats gave a standing ovation. It seems that Democratic opposition is limited to various forms of clapping. (As Al and I were watching a postage stamp-sized video window on our computer, we did not pick up on this during the speech)

4) Democrat Tim Kaine gave the rebuttal afterwards. What is up with that dude’s eyebrow? If you saw it, you know what I’m talking about. It was huge, and flapping away like a bird of prey on his forehead.

And while all the news outlets have seized upon Bush’s “addicted to oil” phrase, his policies don’t match up. According to the LA Times, Bush’s plan to “cut US reliance on Middle East oil by 75% within 20 years” literally means a cut of total oil imports by only about 8% over the course of the next two decades (surprisingly, the US only imports 10% of its oil from the Middle East). And while his plan would cough up an additional $264 million for “clean energy research”, “clean energy” doesn’t necessarily mean “not oil.” While I think all of us would like to see this country replace it’s oil use for clean, renewable energy like solar or wind power, it would take massive financing and massive changes to our entire society. And that’s unlikely to happen while there’s still a drop of oil that a corporation can sell to consumers.


Rock. Bush Boys are already backing off of his claims about oil reduction. More details in the next post, because the denials are so extensive…


Posted by Jake on February 1, 2006 2:17 pm

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